Of course, this is assuming that you've had the right kind of conversation, and that your profile is good enough to make her interested in the first place; I cover both of these issues in detail in my book. If you live close to each other, it will be natural to exchange phone numbers when you arrange the date, but mainly because it will be useful for finding each other or informing each other about being late; you won't really gain any advantages by calling her before your date.
Getting her number is no magic trick, just do it like this: You: Awesome, see you there at eight!
The process of taking things to the next level -- getting a guy you meet online to ask you to hang out offline -- isn't always as smooth as Rico Suave. Take it from a gal who knows (and works in an office that's 60 % male) -- the opposite sex is just as clueless as we are when it comes to finding digital love.
Despite the fact that Match.com, the first online dating site, was founded in 1992 (which is pretty old for anything in the tech world), in reality this form of dating is infantile in terms of creating a massive dating culture shift.
And if you're feeling lost when you log in to your dating site du jour, your e Romeo probably has some questions of his own.
I avoided picking up the phone for any local number I didn’t recognize. He said I knew him as a customer (I worked in a men’s shop), but he didn’t want to reveal who he was. A few months later, I received a mailing tube with a bow on it at the store where I worked. I opened the tube, and it was the original movie poster for starring Katharine Hepburn. His voice seemed a little familiar, but by that time, I was already in a relationship with my husband – one that had started out fast and grown like wildfire. He just kept coming back to the store and hanging out for a few minutes, chatting with me and the women I worked with.
His approach creeped me out and I hated that I felt pressured to give him my digits. One day I received a note saying I had captured his attention during a conversation we’d recently had. He finally called me at the store a few months later, if I can remember correctly. Finally, one day, he said that if I wanted to see the new movie we’d been discussing (, it turns out), he’d love to tag along.
My # is 555-1234 btw :) In nine out of ten times, the girl will give you her number in return.
If there's a substantial distance between you, meeting up will become a bigger deal; grabbing a quick cup of coffee and saying your goodbyes if things don't work out is no longer an alternative.